publishing peace

There are many things and people that are important to me. If you really know me, you know that I live by an unspoken internal rule, and that rule is "everybody matters, and everything matters." It's the reason for many of my worst and deepest flaws. It's why I'm impatient, constantly anxious and easily disappointed. However, it's also one of my greatest strengths as a human being. Since everything about you is important to me, it's easy for me to appreciate your personality and it's easy for me to love you. And it's true, too, that I really do love almost everyone that I meet. I tell you this about myself, not to brag, or to make myself seem better than I am. I tell you this because I hope that it puts the gravity of what I'm about to say into perspective for you. And my words today have to be this: Out of everything I've ever loved and cared about, nothing matters to me as much as the reason for my hope. The Reason for My H...

I got surgery two weeks ago. They fixed a hole in the bone of my right ankle, smoothed it out, filled it in. I lived with constant pain for a week, but the pain subsided. I lived in a drug induced haze for four days (and had really trippy visions of Clifford the big red dog) but then I ran out of pain medication. I went through withdrawals that made me literally want to light myself on fire (don't do drugs, kids. Stay in school.) and then that ended too. And after all that, can I catch a break? Oh course not! My great aunt died, my friends stopped visiting, I finished season 2 of Dr. Who and cried way too many tears about that, and I got really bad acid reflux from ibuprofen. I felt useless and worthless and lonely and sad. Today was my first checkup since the surgery. I got put in a boot -and it hurt me so bad that I nearly threw up from the pain. I have exercises to do but I can't even move my foot on its own. I got pretty discouraged. You're all thinking "w...